revising goals

The past couple weeks have been a challenge for me both physically and probably more mentally. It all started with a twinge in my right shin after a recovery week run that never went away or got better the last couple of weeks. First I got some xrays that showed no problems but after still feeling pain on a test run last week my coach was able to get me a appointment with a great ortho - Dr Marla Kaufman at the UW on Friday. She set me up to get an MRI on Saturday morning - which I have to say was one of the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I am not good at being still - all I wanted to do was wiggle my toes. I had to wait till Monday for the fallow up and find out the results. So I spent the rest of teh weekend trying not to think about it.

I spent the rest of the day Saturday on my bike and had so much fun I just kept ridding until I got hungry and had Kyle meet me at the dairy freeze in North Bend so that my scheduled 3 hour ride did not turn in to 6 hours...

Mid ride I decided to fallow some route markings just to see where they went.

Happened to find some members of "The Herd" and rode with them for :30 or so


View from the bridge on Tolt Hill Road


The old trains in Snoqualmie WA


In North Bend, WA


Sunday we went up to Widbey and while the guys went fishing I rode support for my Mom during her long run (13.5 miles) and she did so great. Made me so proud she is my Mom and how healthy she is at 59 years young :)


The guys caught 2 Coho Salmon - Jerry showing them off.


Kyle & I enjoying the sun


The weekend was so much fun it was not till Monday morning when I talked to Kainoa before the start of masters swim that it kind of hit me. She mentioned that Nike might just not happen... My heart seriously dropped to my feet. I knew that was an option just had not really heard it or said it out loud. The rest of the swim workout and the morning till my appointment at 11:20a I was completely distracted and so nervous for the results.

I was beyond relived when I finally got to find out that the MRI showed no signs of a stress fracture or any tearing in the tissue. Dr Kaufman walked me through all the images from the MRI and what she would be looking for and did not see. Then we talked about next steps. I got a prescription for Physical therapy and massage. I would need to do ice massage twice a day, deep water running, the exercises from PT, keep my fitness up with cross training and at the same time rest my shin. She told me the Nike marathon was still a big maybe and all depended on how things improve or not in the next couple of weeks... Afterwards I talked with Kainoa and she agreed still not sure if a marathon was really an option at this point but agreed to see what Jake (my PT) said about it.

So yesterday I had PT - Jake thinks that as I thought probably running with bad form on my last long run took my shin over the edge in combination with my right hip could still be stronger and lack of flexibility in my feet (especially my right). He also said that if I threw out all my time goals and wanted to still finish the marathon I could probably do that... But that it would probably require a walk/run plan to prevent any pain... hmmm

It was really hard I already gave up on a Boston qualifying time last week after I had to take 2 full weeks off running.. But a walk/run marathon with no time goal at all will be a HUGE mental challenge for me. I am MUCH better at pushing myself and going hard then at going easy and being smart.

If it were any other race I would probably say screw it and not do it but this race means a lot to me. I talked my Mom into doing it as her first half marathon on her 60th birthday. Yeah I know it is more about her doing it but it was meant to be something we both did together. Not to mention I really don't like the idea of not doing a race I signed up and spent money on - I also want the Tiffany necklace and always need another finishers shirt.

So goodbye Boston (for now) and lets just hope I can start running soon so I don't have to do to much walk/run stuff on race day. I'll do it if I have to but would much rather just run even if it is slower than I had been training for before this whole thing started. The new goal is just to be able to run...

recovery week

I was soo glad to have a recovery week. My legs have felt tight and kind of achy all week. I have spent more time with my foam roller & Trigger point this week than in a long time. My legs are slowly excepting their fate of many many miles of running. Since it was a recovery week I had a recovery run on Monday & I only had to do 3 miles of tempo on Wednesday instead of 6 like last week. On Friday my legs did not feel great and I felt tired so Kainoa even let me cancel my "recovery" run. So I got lots and lots of rest and recovery which was wonderful.

Even my weekend long run was "only" 13 miles at steady aerobic pace in zones 3A-3B. Haha yeah I am not so good at just steady aerobic pace. I lost track of the day on Saturday so after a 1:40 team bike ride & Starbucks of course. I decided rather then run a mostly flat course from Leshi I wanted to run the Mercer Island half marathon course in the middle of the day. Note that our fall cool weather is gone and it was over 80 °F the last couple of days. Though Kyle did agree to ride sherpa for me so I had 2 full bottle of liquid (1 plain water, 1 gatorade) and he carried my gels so how bad could it be right.. When I started getting ready i could not find my iPod for the life of me so i told Kyle he had to talk more (I know as if that is really a problem for Sir Talk's a lot).

When I started I was mostly annoyed with a little tinge in my right calf/shin. Overall I felt pretty good and as usual I went out a bit fast. Partly because I only seem to have 2 gears - hard or easy. so i went hard and mile 1 was 7:32, 2 was 7:55, 3 was 7:43, 4 was 7:52 and at this point Kyle was like um slow down you are running way harder then you need to.. So 5 was 7:57. He was great, handed me the water bottle every half mile and my gels at mile 3, 6 & 10 all the while reminding me to breath and relax ect. He even managed to take some video of me running. I know exciting stuff lol.

The hills really got started around mile 6 so it became easier to slow my pace though not my effort (ran a 8:23).
My pace slowed but still kept my average pace well with in my goal of 8:20 m/mi. I was getting really hot and took a salt cap with my gel at mile 6 mark. I really wanted to pour my bottle of water on my head but I knew I would want to drink it more. I dug deep and got mile 7 down to 8:16. But then my stomach started to feel kind of sloshy and I was getting really really hot. There was no wind to help cool me off and less trees for shade :( Mile 8 was 8:31, 9 was 8:57.

Kyle tried to distract me by taking another video of me.

Mile 10 it really got hard. I ate a gel even though my stomach was not happy, my legs felt like cement and my time showed it - 9:23 ouch there goes 8:20 over all pace. I tried my best to get back after it and use some of the downhills but I had a hard time staying on my toes and was slapping my feet to much. I just wanted to be done and started thinking about a lovely ice bath and a slurpee of all things. Well really anything cold sounded good. Mile 11 was back to 8:15 but then 12 was 9:50 because I actually walked a few steps up a hill... At least mile 13 I stayed after it and did my best to just get it done so 9:15 was an improvement. I managed to run up the final hill to the finish line and wound up running 13.18 miles in 1:51:34 that is 8:27 m/mi average pace.

I was just glad to be DONE with it. Well actually I was pretty bummed that I fell apart the last 3 miles especially. Usually I'm pretty good at finishing strong but I just did not have it. It is weird to think that it felt like my 20 miler was easier than "just" 13 mile run this week.

After a :20 min ice bath and coke slurpee I feel better about the run. I was pretty bummed right after but oh well it is just a training run and it will just make me stronger in the end. I'm spending the rest of the night up with my compression socks on, feet up and focusing on recovery so that I can be ready for this coming week. Lets just say it is the opposite of a recovery week... I love a good challenge ;)



One last thing after completely emptying my tri bag and making a huge mess.
I found my iPod and what a shock I had it the whole time. It was in the phone pocket on the strap.. doh

20 mile run

To be completely honest I was a bit nervous about this long run all week. I was not really sure where to run and how it would go since it was so long after a full week with lots of running already. Last night I prepped and planned. Kyle had offered to ride support for me but he had to work ski bonkers around 10 am and to be honest I wanted to sleep in so I decide I would do 2 loops of a 10 mile route. I needed/wanted hills so I figured out how to make my 7 mile hill loop into 10 miles and then I would be able to refill my hand bottle and grab more Gu.

Elevation of the full 20 mile route


Now compare to the Nike Marathon Elevation (see why I wanted to make sure I ran some hills)



In the morning I kind of stalled even more, took my time getting everything ready and waited for my breakfast to digest a bit. Really I was just nervous and unsure if I could really run as fast as I wanted to.

First I had to put enough music on my iPod Shuffle to get me through the run. I wore my favorite Sugoi tri shorts (shorty short 4") that I have worn so much they so broken in/comfortable but still stay in place and a Sugoi fizz tank. I also decide to run no socks because the last time I wore socks I got more blisters than when I went without (I know seems weird to me to). I made sure to use TONS of bodyGlide on my feet and where the Fizz tank always seems to chaff under the arm (sorry but stupid place for a seem). I thought it was cold so I grabbed arm warmers but with in a mile I was burning up and they went in the pocket. I even remembered to weigh myself - 133lbs pre run. As far as nutrition went for the first loop I had a plain Gu at mile 2, 5, 7, 10. I would have liked to have gatorade but my hand bottle does not seem to seal anymore and it makes my hand sticky so I went with plain water. I also took 3 sportlegs and 1 salt cap.

Finally around noon I got my butt out the door and started running.

The first couple of miles I realized it was not that cold and it actually was warm and rather muggy. My legs felt pretty good but i had a hard time finding the right rhythm. To be honest my head was not in the best place today. I had a very hard time trusting myself and just running. I kept over thinking everything and almost running scared that I would not run fast enough. So the entire run I was fighting myself and my legs. I knew I wanted to run the 10 mile loop in about 1:25ish. As always I went out very strong running sub 8 min mile pace and slowed to about 8:30 pace on the hills. I was very happy when I finished 10 miles at 1:22:11 ahead of my goal time :)

My personal aid station.


I emptied my pocket of wrappers and grabbed the rest of the Gu's I needed for miles 12, 15, 17. Drank some Gatorade Endurance, refilled my hand bottle with water. Took 2 salts because I was sweating so much - I felt like I had gone for a swim I was so sweaty. I also decided to put on a very thin pair of socks because a spot on my left heal felt like it might have been forming a blister.. Of course I also had to txt Kyle and let him know I was half way and post it on twitter/Facebook (yes I am a super dork). I joked with Kyle if it was ok if I could take a nap before doing the 2nd loop... It really was very tempting.

Once I was refilled I was back running in a couple minutes (yes I stopped the watch/garmin since it is just a training run). The first couple of miles my legs did not want to run as fast as before but at least they stayed under my goal pace. As expected the 2nd loop was harder. I started to feel more tired though my legs actually still felt pretty good and continued to the rest of the run which was wonderful. At this point my entire take was sweated through and I'm sure all the people staring at me were wondering how I could sweat so much when it was not that hot.
Since my legs actually felt pretty good I managed to keep pace with the first loop and actually ran the hills a couple of seconds faster. Though I to do that I had to yell at myself a bit more. I was glad I wore a bracelet from the IMC crew that said "Toughen the Fuck up" and I repeated that to myself a lot, that and "pick up your feet", and generally tried to think of what Kyle would tell me if he was there. I would have also expected my heart rate to go up because I felt like I was having to work harder but actually it stated about the same..

The last mile is flat and I pushed myself to make sure I made my goal time. Now saying that I am horrible at math so I finished the 20 miles at 02:44:07 (4 whole minutes ahead of my goal time). The last mile I ran in 7:41 lol. No surprise as soon as I got to my drive way I just laid down and stayed there for about 10 minutes (or so it felt). I only got up because Toko (my cat) was meowing so much from the window. So i moved inside to the living room floor, laid down a towel and proceeded to fall asleep for an hour or so. I blame Toko because he curled up next to me and just purred.

Eventually i woke and txt Kyle - he had already txted me asking if I was done yet. oops Eventually I got up and weighed myself - 131 lbs post run (lost only 2 lbs). Then I had my favorite recovery drink of strawberry Recoverite and chocolate milk and Kyle brought home 2 bags of ice for me to take an ice bath :)

So some overall lessons.. Trust my legs and relax about times/pace I can do it - no need to run scared. It is not arm warmer time yet. BodyGlide is a good thing because I got no chaffing or blisters :) My nutrition went really well plain Gu and 1 Roctain Gu half way for some extra caffeine. I need to continue to work on my pacing I seem to go out pretty harder then I need to. It is defiantly time to wash my Newton shoes they smell HORRIBLE and even made the socks I put on dirty. At this point I need to just keep after it - I am getting stronger and within my goal pace for the race in October.
Finally my reward a yummy Trophy cupcake called snowball (Toko thought he should get some to).

loving the long stuff

Last week it was very obvious that I have started training for a marathon. I ran 35 miles from Thursday to Thursday (rest days). The best part is that I felt pretty good. On my midweek tempo run I found my inspiration and even though my legs were tired I made each and every mile count. I figure if I'm going to be sore and run I might as well make it worth while. So I ran my tempo run as with full focus and it was great.
Ok so the running is not a huge surprise since I do have a marathon in October.. But last week I agreed to ride on Saturday with Laurie and couple of other teammates who are doing IMC. Now I agreed before actually knowing how long the ride would be... When I asked Kainoa if it was ok that I move my long run to Friday so I could ride on Saturday she asked if I was riding Laurie's entire 116 mi ride.. I figured why not esp if I got my long run done on Friday since it is more of the priority.

Friday I headed out of work early so I could run a bit earlier.. Well that was the plan until my cat Toko talked me into a nap. I woke up at 5pm and headed out on my favorite 7 mi loop. My plan was to run it twice, lap 1 take it easy and and find a good rhythm and try and maintain the same pace for lap 2 on tired legs.
Lap 1 went by pretty quickly. I had the amphipod 12 oz hand bottle and drank all teh gatorade, I took a gu rocktane at around 3 mi and 6 mi so that i would have plenty of fuel for lap 2.
I finished lap 1 and refilled my bottle, grabbed another 2 gu's and headed back out. The first mile is pretty flat , then a mile downhill which of course felt great. Then I started on the hilly part of the loop. I ate a gu before the first uphill as would be expected my legs felt heavy but i stayed focused and kept my pace up. Even on the downhills my legs started to hurt a little bit. I dug a little bit and managed to finish the 2nd lap 1 min faster than the 1st :) For a total of 14 hilly miles in 2:00 flat. I figure since I choose a hilly marathon I should train hills.. I am so happy with how strong I felt and I was hold on for th second lap even though my legs were still tired from the week of running.

Saturday morning I met Laurie, Jodie, and Greg at 7am to get started on the 116 mile ride to Arlington. I had my bike fully loaded. 7 plain Gu's, 3 bottle of Gatorade endurance, salt sticks with both salt and sport legs, garmin... I was ready as I could be. Especially since I had my jersey pockets filled with 3 mini cliff bars, 3 more bottle worth of gatorade power, some cash, ID, and iPhone (like I go anywhere with out it). The weird thing was we all had our arm warmers on and I actually had socks on which I have not worn either for almost 2 months. Laurie (master route planner) had maps and que sheets just in case we wanted them.
We were on the road at about 7:15a heading north. It is great riding with this group because we are all pretty close to the same pace and well they are all training for IMC and thus they all want some time pulling so I got to just draft along behind them. My goal was to just hang on the entire ride. We picked up Bruce, a friend of Laurie's along East Snoqualmie Valley (17 miles in) which was great because he knew the area we were going and he was was a strong cyclist as well.

We stopped at a park in Monroe around mile 25 to grab some water and potty break the were back at it pretty quickly. We kept heading north towards the Lake Stevens course (I think). To be completely honest I had no clue where exactly we were most of the ride which was added motivation to stay on their wheels.
In Granit Falls we stopped and grabbed some more water. Well I grabbed a Starbucks Double Shot and a gatorade.
Then it was back on the road heading further out to the middle of nowhere..

I focused on keeping up on my nutrition which since it was not very warm was kind of hard. Just did not think about drinking as much.. I did eat a Gu an hour and a mini cliff bar every 2 hours. But I was behind on the gatorade big time - I usually drink a bottle an hour and was averaging a bottle every 2. I had a bad headache that would not go away and the toe on my right foot that had been stung hurt pretty bad being crammed in the bike shoe.
At some point in the middle of nowhere we came across a mile or two of fresh gravel roud :/ Which completly sucked. We were SO LUCKY no flats, no slips, nothing. Just a bit slower.
We made it back to Granite Falls again and I got another Starbucks Doubleshot to help me along. Of course the gas station store lady remembered us and thought we were crazy.
I was starting to hit the wall so the sugar was good but only lasted so long. I tried to eat more but it was just not helping as much. The last 30 miles or so I had to dig pretty deep just to stay on their wheels. It did not help that there was a head wind so if I fell off the back there was no way i was getting back on. Everyone was nice enough to not completely kill me and Kept an eye out for me. Bruce stopped at his drive way where we had met him on the way out.
I managed to stay with them most of the way back until the last long climb back over Novelty Hill in Redmond took me way over the edge. I fell back probably only a minute but it hurt to stay that close just so I could see if and where they turned.
Once we were about 5 miles from being back at the start and I knew exactly where I was I let go and slowed down. It was hard enough just to keep pedaling.
I got back and they were all getting ready to head out on their hour runs. I called it quits and was done. I figured the 3+ extra hours on the bike kind of equalized the :30 min run I was supposed to do.
I'm glad there are no pictures because I must have looked pretty bad. I certainly felt bad. I immediately took off my bike shoes and grabbed a chocolate milk and added it to the recoverite I had brought with me. Then rinsed off and waited for them to get back from their runs.
I have to say I was a bit bummed I was not able to finish the ride strong but then a friend Cathleen reminded me I was ridding with 3 athletes that have been training hard to be able to do an ironman canada so with that realisation I was just happy I survived the ride at all.

Later Laurie sent us the ride profile.. No wonder it was so hard.. Just a few hills.

And because I ran on Friday I got Sunday off completely. I had a big breakfast, took a 3 hour nap in the middle of the day, only woke up because I was hungry for lunch and went to bed early :) It was a hard couple of days but I have to say even though it hurt I LOVED every minute of it and kind of wish I could do it again this coming weekend.. Oh well I will enjoy a recovery week and on Saturday I will do the exact opposite and race a local sprint triathlon..

coming out of the fog

This past week I finally got back into the swing of training but still felt kind of off. I got all my work outs in I'm just struggling when it comes to the hard efforts and it takes me about 30 min to warm up. In masters swim I had to use my flippers to keep up and had to break up some of the hard efforts. On the bike and run i just felt kind of putsy and struggled with my breathing at the higher zones. I started weezing while running hill repeats on Wednesday night.
Most of the week my confidence has been almost nonexistent especially when I realized that Clearwater is less than a month away and I don't feel 100%. I mean I really only have another week to train and then it is taper time. I know I can finish but I would like to have a good day and right now I don't feel stellar. Honestly it is hard to feel completely confident about the race when I have been feeling fatigued and operating at half speed.

However Friday things started to get a bit better. I slept in and instead of going to masters swim I swam after work. I actually felt pretty good in the water and was able to get most of my 100s down below 1:50 which I am happy with.
I felt even more like myself on Saturday. Kyle and I went for along run out on the Snoqualmie River Trail out in Carnation. For some reason it always seems to be raining when we run out there. As usual it took a good 30 min to warm up and get in a good rhythm but once I did I felt great. I also managed to not focus on the rain and thought about what I might want to do for races the next year or two. It is amazing once I find something positive to think about the miles/time just breeze by. I ran for 2 hours a which felt completely comfortable and I staid with in zone 2 almost the entire way. The best part is that I was able to get about 14 miles in that time which is back to my usual pace :)

Today I slept in and puttered around the house till about 11a and then got on my bike for a 2 hour ride with some tempos and fallowed that up with a 40 min run. I just did the lake Sammamish loop and took it easy for the first 45 min while I road west lake sammamish road - which is a horrible road to ride on - it is so bumpy and uneven I had acelerade splashing out all over te place. It did not help that last night we had the 1st wind storm of the fall/winter and there was derby everywhere. Then once I was on east lake Sammamish I started the to focus and did two 30 min at Olympic pace. I was surprised I actually felt pretty good. My legs were a bit heavy from running yesterday but in all I felt good. I took my time transitioning to the run but I knew I would overheat if I did not change out of capris and a jacket. For the run I went easy the first 20 min then with super heavy legs had to turn it up to a a zone 3/ harder effort. It was really hard but I found something to repeat over and over and managed to almost relax and ignore my legs and pick up the pace. I passed my house at 35 min and almost stopped and called it quits but talked myself into finishing what I stated and ran another 5 min.

So now after the weekend of training I feel better about where I stand. I don't feel perfect but better. Hopefully this coming week will help me some more with my confidence. Really who know the mental piece is always my greatest weakness - even more than the swim. But I'm optimistic that Kainoa will have me as well prepared as I can hope to be.. and as she keeps telling me "I'm stronger than I think". Time to break out some mental training and all the mind games that go along with it...

sticking to it

I'm not going to do Lake Stevens.. I'm going to stay with Vineman. It is the race I have been training for and I just decided I should stay with what I had planed and I need to finish what I started.
Kyle on the other hand most likely will not do Vineman because of the heat - knowing him if he is not going to race it he will not be going anywhere near the race and will probably need to stay home so he does not decide to do it. So the logistics of everything is up in the air. But this weekend I will not be racing I will just cheer for Kyle and do my final build week before tapering.

mixed

It has been a couple a weeks since I have felt like posting anything.. I'm not totally sure why but I have just not been motivated to blog much - I have been using twitter and brightkite though - it is easier you only get 140 characters. I have been training and feel strong. Mostly focusing a lot on the bike and then running stronger/faster off the bike - since those felt like my weaknesses in Hawaii. So far so good I seem to be training at my usual race pace with out to much effort and have added a bunch of speed work.

My training was a bit weird/light last week because we left on Thursday for the East Coast to go to a memorial service at West Point. We managed to get a long run in on Saturday but it was miserably hot and muggy. I felt like I was in a steam room - I don't know how those cadets do it. We did not know a lot of options of where to run so we ran from our hotel to the the West Point post - luckily they let us run through the post - we carried ID for the security process. It seems pretty flat in a car but it is defiantly not - you are either going uphill or down and it felt like mostly up. Crazy enough it felt like the run in Hawaii - my legs felt heavy and I wished I had a cup of ice the entire time. But in the end some how I managed to still averaged under a 8:20 min/mile pace..
Other than the run the weekend was filled with trying to survive the time change by taking naps though out the day, spending time with Kyle's family, learning about West Point and Franklin D. Roosevelt and lots of time in a car or waiting for a plane... I got home last night at 2:00am because our flight left over 3 hours late - half of which was while we sat on the runway at JFK... it sucked big time.

On another subject - I have to admit I'm not all that excited about Vineman 70.3.. I think right now I'm only really looking forward to seeing my Dad and/or my Dad getting to see me race. I'm especially not looking forward to driving all the way down there and back. Kyle is about 90% sure he will not be doing it because of the heat - his doctors said no more hot races after getting heat stroke in Hawaii.
It has gotten to the point I have even been considering doing Lake Stevens on Sunday instead of Vineman... I mean with all the travel I wound up having a pretty light week so I could just continue this week as a taper instead of a final build week.. hmm it is very very tempting esp since Kyle is doing the race and our family is already coming out to cheer for him - they could cheer for me as well - my Dad may even be up hear as they are escaping to Seattle from the bad air quality in the bay area. we will just have to see.

windy day before race

Today we shifted our focus completely to race prep. We woke up early and did our last work out. We did a short little swim, then transitioned on the bike for a short 20 min ride then ran 10 minutes. Seems simple and short... Not when the wind is blowing so hard that I could only go 10 mph on the flats. The was really choppy on the swim, then horrendous headwind on the ride out and strong tail wind on the way back. The tail wind was great but it as a little sketchy to turn out of the wind. I stayed loose and figured it was good training but it was hard with the headwind. Then the run was again a headwind out and tail wind back. I was able to keep my pace in the headwind a bit better but it just made my legs feel extra heavy.
Afterwards I iced my legs, showered and got my run stuff together for registration. We rode our bikes over to the hotel to avoid the traffic/parking. So got some more practice riding in the wind and it had warmed up some more as well. We picked up our packets after signing our lives away then prepared our bike to run bags.



Next was getting our bikes ready to check in at T1 area at Hapuna Beach State Park. My bike felt great - may switch out my front wheel for one of Kyle's training wheels if it is windy but we are going to do that in the morning. Kyle's bike was making weird noises so we decided to take it in to the local bike shop to have them look at it just to be safe and sure. They made afew tweets and we were heading back to the beach to check them in. My transition area is very close to the exit of the T1 area which is cool and it is on the far side so it will be easier to find.
Kyle is about midway through the transition area.
Now the wind had picked up quite a lot - some of the gusts were so strong it was hard to stand up straight. This brought the first set of butterflies to my stomach. It only got worse once I saw the white caps on the beach/swim course. You may not be able to see in the picture but there are white caps and big orange buoys that mark the course. I was getting really uneasy about the race..

We headed back for the Athlete meeting where they tell us a little about the course and talk about the rues - especially the no drafting rule on the bike course. My guess is if it is windy the refs will be handing out a lot of red cards for drafting tomorrow but that is just a guess.
On the way back to the condo we walked along the beach and took a bit of a breather and hung out with the turtles for a bit.


Once back I laid down a little nap before dinner. I visualized my race and went though all my positive thoughts I will pull from tomorrow when the wind blows or in the full heat of the run. I know I am strong and I don't need to waste energy worrying about things I have no control of like the wind. No matter what I will do my best and I won't be the only one - weather equally effects everyone. If it is windy I will be ok.

After eating dinner I sat and watched the sun set and just cleared my mind and breathed.


I have all my swim and bike stuff ready, all my nutrition stuff ready. Everything is ready for a good day no matter what happens. Time to go to bed, go back over my race plan one last time and think positive thoughts. Kyle as usual is ahead of me - already has his eyes closed as as he is "watching" the Giro lol

12 mph winds

This morning after a lovely breakfast and taking our time to get ready we did a 45 min bike ride to run brick... No big deal right.. The palm trees were being blown around a little bit but nothing to bad. Once we got out on our bikes I got pushed around like crazy, first a head wind, then the dreaded side wind, maybe a tail wind for a little bit in there but only in combination with a side wind. I knew there is always a chance for it to be windy on the the Queen K - you hear lots of horror stories. It freaked me out. I have ridden across I90 bridge in the wind a few times and this was more scary. Maybe because I let the thought of being blown into the lava creep into my head.. At first I tuffed it out in my aero bars as much as I could but it started to hurt my left shoulder a bit and then a gush came and I had to go out on the flight deck. It would at will grab my front wheel and pull me around. Instead of going with it (like I would in skiing) I let it freak me out.
As he should be Kyle was pretty far out in front of me - I could see him but with no hope of catching him.. I stopped at 24 minutes and waited to see him coming back. Once I saw a little red speck in the distance I turned around heading back. He was nice enough to ride on windy side to offer some block on the way back but still it would catch my front wheel from time to time and I was riding way to stiff. We talked a little bit about ways to deal with or go with the wind a bit to keep my wheels from making me in to a kite. I played with different things on the way back. Nothing totally perfect or anything but at least helped me focus a bit more.
After 48 min of riding in the wind I was soo ready to transition to a run.. I did a fast transition - practicing what I will do for the race. Even a full race belt with gels just to test comfort.. I did forget my sunglasses but after running with out I have decided I will not wear them anyways - they make my face way to hot. I completely let my legs determine the pace - not pushing to hard or forcing them to slow down. I ran 1.5 miles in 12 min out on the road surrounded by the lava - it was soo hot and of course on the way back there was a head wind.. But I felt good. I was able to let go completely of the frustrating/windy ride and just run. Which is exactly my plan for the race - live in the moment and do my best in that moment.
After an ice bath to cool off - Kyle and I talked a lot about riding in the wind. He did not really have any issues with it and actually sees it as a strength. I have a ton of experience skiing in the wind and know how to deal with it - I really just need to apply that knowledge to when I'm on the bike. Don't tense up and stay loose enough to be able to adapt. I have really good balance - I just need to use it and most of all stay calm don't let the wind beat me. Everyone will have to deal with the same conditions - wind, heat, all of it so I just ned to do what I can and keep going. I ride again tomorrow so I maybe able to get some more practice in wonderful wind.. At the same time I'm really hoping it is calm on Saturday till I'm done then it can do what ever it wants.

We spent the rest of the day doing random things - my bike saddle bag broke, and Kyle accidentally cut my aero bottle straw (thinking it was his) so we had to go back to the bike shop again.. Traffic sucked and there was a lot of "vog" - we could even smell sulfur a couple times from the volcano which did not really makes up want to do much activity...
We did go for a walk in evening and saw a bunch of sea turtles (Kyle's favorite animal).



I'm just glad it is still early in the week. Though they are setting up the race headquarters in the hotel which mean s it is coming .. but there is still plenty of time to enjoy Hawaii and more important be ready to race on Saturday :) Ok time to get some good recovery sleep... the more the better right.

moderate

It was just sort of an ok week nothing special - I got all my training in and everything but never really felt stellar. Just sort of got it done kind of week I guess. One of the goals was to get 3 work outs for each sport - so far I have 2 done sp I just have to get a swim, bike and run in this weekend.
Let see Monday I had off as a rest day. tuesday I ran at lunch and the swam 3000 yds - by the end I was a complete prune and was exhausted. Wednesday I rode to and from work - 5 min faster on the way in than the last time and 5 min slower on the way home because of baseball traffic. Thursday morning I had pilates with lots of jumping and worked on rotation a lot. In the evening I ran with 2 min hill repeated 4 times - I choose a good long hill for the repeats but the rest of my route was also hilly and shorter than I expected so I had to run in circles a bit to get the full 5 miles. I was so beat I could have drank a gallon of chocolate milk afterwards. Tonight I swam again - not quite as far but for the first time Coach had me do intervals - 200 in 3:45 and I could just not do it - I was 3 seconds over both times and I was going at full effort. I was just not really feeling it tonight.

Now what I am excited about is tomorrow I'm going skiing at Alpental with my brother. Alpental has always been my winter home away from home. I just love the place. It is where I always feel myself, I spent a lot of time with my Dad there, I met Kyle there, it has a very special place in my heart. And I have not gotten in very many days of skiing this year - of all years when they had amazing snow all winter. It may not be the best timing for my other training but I feel the need to go up and be in the snow.

Other thoughts these days is that Vancouver Half Marathon is next weekend and Hawaii 70.3 is a MONTH away.. Only a month!! I feel like I need more time to be more prepared. I don't feel ready even though I am way stronger than I was last year at this time but still.. Now I can't wait to go to Hawaii and spend some time in the warm sunny weather but I don't exactly feel ready to race. I want to be faster - way faster than last year. I was injured last year and had to walk almost the entire half marathon - so I feel like I need to prove something this year. So I have a month to get my head ready to race. I know my body is in way better shape and I can do it. I just need to get my head screwed on right.
The mental game is defiantly my greatest weakness - I have gotten better at staying confident during training but the stress and expectations of racing still messes with me. Vancouver will be a good test not only for my legs but also for my head. I know I can run faster I just have to believe it, stick to it and not give up mid-race.

Okay with that I'm off to get my ski and run stuff together for tomorrow. How does a ski to run brick sound :)

Is there a balance

First a recap of my training - been running 3 days a week, swimming twice a week and spinning 1-2 days a week. I have also been doing pilates twice a week - which has helped a lot with my shoulder and my overall core strength. I feel on track for mercer island half marathon in a couple weeks.
Last weekend I was in California to visit my Dad and was lucky enough to run in sunny 70 degree weather - it was so wonderful not having to wear a million layers. Since I did not really know the area my route was all over the place. The first mile and a half was straight up hill on pretty rough trail which made the rest of the run more difficult.
Even so I ran 8 miles in 1:11 which I was happy with esp with the extra time I had to take to figure out where to go.

Now on to my struggle balancing how to fit in everything I want to in a day or even a week. The while work, life and training balance is becoming harder then ever. Last year I let a lot of things slip to focus on training for Ironman but I can't do that again it made a lot of things worse later. Also I don't want to; my career and life are also important to me. I guess I just feel overwhelmed right now. It is not that I don't want to train - I do - I love how it makes me feel and helps me handle the stress that is in the rest of my life. At the same time it does not help me have time to do all the other things that I need or want to do. I feel like things are slipping through the cracks - even tri related stuff. I even need to get a bunch of design stuff done for tri-style but I never have enough time. Like tonight I could not do the run off the bike like I was suppose dto because I did not get on my bike till 9:30pm and sorry but 11:00pm is to late to go run especially 2 miles by myself in the dark.. I know this is a challenge for a lot of age group triathlets. I'm sure I will figure something out but right now it is difficult.

lost confidence

Friday night I went and ran 3 miles at the Bellevue half mile track with the only goal to be able to say "yeah no pain"... I almost made it but I guess it was just not meant to be because on the last quarter of a mile my left leg started to lock/tighten up. I guess at least I was able to make it about 2.75m miles with no pain yeah. Hmm just does not have the same ring to it.. oh well I guess there will be more elliptical stuff and other cross training. Afterwards I felt VERY disappointed. I don't love running my any means yet but I HATE not being able to run. Kyle was nice enough to help massage and loosen up my leg but over all the experience was kind of a bummer. Kyle also looked at the wear on my shoes and it very obvious that I am not running centered on my feet - I run very much on the outside of my foot which then puts tension on the outside of my leg ect. I'm hoping that with some running drills I can correct this and get on with my running.
Saturday(today) morning the crew (minus Futa) met up north near the Maltby Cafe for a 50ish mile ride. The plan was to connect to the Lake Stevens 70.3 bike course to see what it was like ect. I woke up not really stoked to ride and that feeling never really wore off - I know that I was still thinking about not being able to run which just brings me down right now. Anyway we got going after dinking with bikes and gear - it was surprisingly chilly even though I wore my capris, vest and arm warmers.
My goal/focus for the ride was to work on eating while riding so to start I took a salt tab using the wonderful salt stick which was much easier than the zip lock bag I used before so that was good. Actually in the eating department things were going fine through the first 10-15 miles - ate a gel no problem - drank acceleraide and water... Until we got on some roads with no shoulder and lots or big trucks that seemed to not share the road which made me very reluctant to move my hands away from my handle bars to do anything - so my consumption went down drastically. By the time there was less traffic I just kind of forgot to eat/drink much. Around this same time we became somewhat lost - the map said one thing and the road signs said another - this also caused me to think I should hold off eating to much since I may need it later if we are out riding longer than I expected.. Yes I know this is dumb now looking back but still that is what I thought and did. I actually did not eat another gel the rest of the ride - I did have a snickers bar, half a bottle of gatoriade and a bike of Kyle's hot dog when we stopped at some little store along the centennial trail on our way back. Before the final climb back to our cars (well probably 5 miles) Kyle noticed that my water bottles were almost completely full then proceeded to scold me and then when I did not drink more he even yelled at me to drink - even using that I knew that Col would say the same thing and so on.. He was very persistent so I did drink a bunch of my accelraide bottle. So not the best example of fallowing my nutrition plan..
Now the rest of the ride - I sucked today I could not hold a wheel (with only a few exceptions when I feared for my life if I did not), climb, spin - pretty much I was slow (and useless;).. The crew had to wait for me multiple times when we had to turn off or something so I did not get lost - they were all very nice about it and said it was no big deal and stuff. I felt bad holding them up but I just did not feel any sort of spark to make me pick up the pace - I just did not have it in me today. Which was retarded my legs pretty much felt fine until the very end when they got sort of tight but I'm sure that had way more to do with my lack of nutrition the second half of the ride than anything else. I guess I can't really only explain it and I just did not feel like I could do it - which again is dumb because only a couple of weeks ago I was doing great - I could climb - do what ever - I was not getting dropped all the time..
I know it does not have to do with my body it has to do with my head and how I feel about my abilities right now and to be honest I feel like I suck (which I of course then did). I know that after Vancouver half marathon I lost some confidence and then in Hawaii I was really disappointed (yes I know logically I did just fine even good esp on the swim and the bike and I finished) but ever since that run/walk I have been a mess and I don't really know how to get my head/thoughts back in order. I am a total newbie to a lot of the triathlon stuff but the mental side of things has defiantly become the hardest aspect of the entire process. I am very aware that I need to find my confidence again I just don't know how I will do it... Kyle suggested I just wake up and start being cocky and use it as a jumping place and eventually I will be confident again as I see improvements or something. But that does not really feel right so who know knows I only have so much time before IMC when I need to be at my best in every way to make it through the day...